Bohemian B’s Beat

Broken Crayons still Colour

If you have ever been within a few meters of any children’s playroom, be it at home, at school or even in a restaurant that offers such facilities, you would have observed (if you do observe that is) the magnitude of broken crayons laying around.  The majority of kids I've had the privilege of interacting with one way or another, don’t have a huge hang-up about colouring with a broken crayon, simply for the reason that it still works.  Whether this crayon is being used to create an artwork masterpiece to be taken home for mommy to put up on the fridge, to bring a colouring-in book’s page to life or normally from our younger budding artists to add a splash of colour along the long drab passageway at home.  Whatever the canvas may be, the point is that the broken crayons work just as well as the shiny new and whole ones. 

   I love taking a moment to just observe little ones and how they interact with each other but more importantly how they see the world and implement their own reasoning.  They demonstrate such simplicity and pure innocence, untainted by the ‘grown-up’ world. 

Once you and I used to demonstrate this absolute simplicity, but then we grew up and proceeded to do what we do best... complicate life as we know it.  And during this complication process, we get knocked down, hurt, broken even and for some unknown reason (probably due to our complex minds) we end up feeling useless, worthless and broken, aka, un-useable. 

   During my grade 8 year of high school (standard 6 in those years), I was forced to attend the mundane home economics class (today I wish I had shown more of an interest back then, but it is also a known fact that pre-adolescents are ‘very clever’), where the teacher attempted to teach us ‘little ladies’ how to be good home creators.  Although cooking and sewing never appealed to me much, there was one class which did grab my attention and made such an impact on me that to this day I can look back with fond memories.  We learnt a beautiful skill in the form of candle making and what was imperative was to impart our own special touch and create something using our own creative imaginations.  The tools needed for this exercise were very basic, a pot, broken candles to melt for wax,  a stick with string attached (to tie and dip the candle in the making in the hot wax melting in the pot), a plain, white candle and you guessed it - broken crayons.  As the wax melted in the pot we added crayons to make coloured wax which we then dipped our plain white candle into to transform it into a one of a kind master creation candle.  What stood out for me then already, was that these ugly looking broken and seemingly useless crayons that was used added the beauty and unique character to a once plain, boring and even lifeless looking candle.

   Broken crayons still colour.  If you feel that life has knocked you around and rendered you relatively (or even completely) broken, never forget that broken crayons can still colour.  Just add glitter and you will still shine!

Inspiration flows where your will go, keep thinking of broken crayons, glitter and all things shiny and maybe, just maybe inspiration will follow.

Glitter greeting (and all things shiny)

Bohemian B

Bohemian B’s Beat

Wide open spaces.....

“And as soon as she let go and exhaled, she felt a diminishing sensation detecting a gradual void in her interior. The void wasn't of emptiness but a void of space, increasing and expanding slowly; in and out, back and forth, up and down stretching her inner-self like when a bubble is tenderly blown within its elements allowing the breath of being to pass expanding throughout; to the point where she sensed her heartbeat and total peace of mind.” ―A passage from the novel, - “Her Will” by Floranova B. Msc.

    No, I have not read this entire novel, although I am intensely motivated to, I have only read a few short passages such as this one, however I feel a distinguishing likeness and identification as to what this author  is portraying.  The phrase ‘Wide empty spaces’ could sum up a magnitude of scenarios, encouraging many mental images varying from person to person, for me it describes the void inside of myself which I had harboured and even nourished for way to long.  A void which only I myself could fill as it was a void of self acceptance, self love and self respect.  On way too many occasions in the past, I have ‘sold my-self short’, allowing circumstances, society, peers and even those people closes to me who I love dearly to dictate my worth, my value and even my purpose to me. 

   Now if there is one thing I have come to realise, it is that if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.  You will cling to things which do not necessarily serve you, but make you feel special, needed and important even. However, as you are not rooted into something steadfast, as the winds of change blow, you find yourself swept up and away as the wind scoops all that has no roots.  Depending on the strength of this wind, you could be tossed and twirled and blown this way and that and eventually could find yourself landing in the most unlikely place for you to be.  The wind will settle, as will you and because you are not rooted, you will cosy up to the next comfortable thing to cling to, where you will once again feel special, needed and important.  But what if you have landed on a spot which is used as a compost heap?  If you are carrying a void inside of yourself much like the one Iv described, then you will believe that this compost heap needs you, that you are very lucky to be there and should consider yourself lucky to have this purpose.  You will believe this compost talk until they day you discover your most important component......Your WILL.

 “In the midst of her torment, she felt a sense of hope and trying to understand the gravity of the situation, she thought, 'the circumstances do not own me. I am in the moment and I am capable to decide, either to leave or to stay.' Leading her to understand that it didn't matter how low her self-esteem was; for there was another sensation within her, an oomph driving her forward with certainty and not doubt. The people around her could diminish her self-esteem all they wanted; nevertheless no one was competent to take away the source of her dreams, her drive, a faculty that she was inescapably bonded with, but she had not quite identified within--Her Will.” – Another passage from “Her Will” by Floranova B. Msc.

  Ultimately, we need to learn to let go and letting go is never really an easy thing to do, however if we do not learn to let go of whatever it is that is holding us back from our pre-designed destiny and our dreams and if we do not anchor ourselves firmly in the belief that we have a purpose, then we will continue to settle amount the compost leaves.  I don’t know about you, but I would much rather be used in an elaborate and majestically flamboyant bouquet of colour, encouraging a sense and feel of joy, positivity and creatively motivated thoughts posed to the dismal idea of a compost heap.

As we let go of our void within (whatever it may be) we could find that those ever increasing wide empty spaces which cause us to be forever searching for the missing ingredient, are actually wide OPEN spaces and not really empty at all.  Open to be filled with all the ingredients you already possess, but might not be aware of, ingredients such as; self-worth, self-acceptance, hope, creativity, capability.......your own WILL’.  And in letting go of the low-self esteem instigating thoughts and realising your own self-worth and will, your soul and mind and even your heart could find peace, love, hope and  joy......self-acceptance, the very things you may have been searching for all  these years.

So off you go, letting it go and finding something to stand for (if you haven’t already) make your wide open spaces work for you and fill them up with shiny, glittery beauty!

Glitter greetings (and all things shiny)

Bohemian B

Bohemian B’s Beat

All that glitters......

As the steady decline to the end of the year speeds up, we start feeling the pressure of ‘the race to the finish line’ of 2014.  Year-end finals, wrapping up business deals, finalising projects, year-end functions and not to mention holiday arrangements, family gatherings and the highlight of the year, Christmas.  Throughout the year everybody works diligently at earning a living... basically to just remain living.  How often have I not only heard, but said, “We work to survive only, not actually to live”.  We have become so materialistic and even greedy, wanting more and more and more that we have forgotten what the essence of life really is.  As we progress in our careers and move up the corporate ladder so to speak, our standard of living goes up to.  Not that we can afford what we are adapting to, but rather because we have a status image to uphold.  So we end up working harder and longer hours just to be able to meet our self-set needs (which we don’t actually need really, but want rather).

   Then comes Christmas, December holidays, and the ever anticipated count-down to the ‘Happy-New-Year’ celebration and all our hard earnings and savings are blown in a matter of weeks.  365 days minus the holiday and Christmas season of (give or take) three weeks equals 344 days of build up, saving, hard work and hours behind the grinding stone so that we can lavishly enjoy a time of rest and relaxation and rejuvenation before the onset of the bright new year which lies ahead, holding untold adventures, opportunities and truck loads of fortunes to be made. It seems like the more we have the more we want and the more we want the more we spend.  The more we spend the harder we have to work and the harder we work the more time we have to dedicate to work.  The more time we sacrifice the less time we spend with what matters the most, that which is of more value than our comfy homes, luxury vehicles, plasma televisions and the latest’s craze in whatever it is that society dictates to us, our family, friends and loved ones. 

   The mad rush of society has got me (and many others I am sure) frazzled, worn out and exhausted as I try to ‘keep-up’, I find myself craving simplicity.  It is so easy to get caught up in the stigma, in the downward spiral of becoming labelled stereo-type, easily forgetting what really IS of value, what is irreplaceable. Quite frankly I've never been able to ‘fit in’ with the way society works, not really.  Oh, I've played the part well before I managed to come to the conclusion that I don’t need to be like everybody else, I don’t want to be a sheep ( not that I have anything against sheep, they are delightful little fluffy beings, if not a tad on the ‘slow’ side).  I have always been told that I am ‘Stroom op’, yes I guess I am, but I just find it relatively impossible to be ‘stereo type’.  I have always danced to my own rhythm, prancing around in my own little bubble and even though I do love all that glitters, I have realized that it is not all it makes out to be.  However, what does remain loyal and ever present is that which carries more value than all the riches, Christmas presents and elaborate holidays? The people I love. And who love me.  My family, my children and my friends.  Turns out I am rich beyond any comparison.  Blessed with the riches of true love from those closest to me.  And they love me enough to accept me just the way I am. I decorate them in all things shiny and all that glitters (metaphorically speaking of course) as I overpower them with my numerous personalities (only the shiny ones of course) and overwhelm them with glitter in abundance, you see I am an all or nothing kind of girl and I know my all is MUCH and sometimes too much for some to handle, but that’s alright, I love them anyway. I realise I am a special kind and it takes a special kind to ‘survive’ me.  It is for this reason that I acknowledge their value in my life and count myself radically wealthy. 

   As for my year-end holiday, I will not be going to the most elaborate destination lying on a beach and sipping cocktails to my heart’s content, I will rather choose the route of simplicity and dote love on whom ever I get to share the holiday season with (not a lot of R’s needed).

   So happy mad rush and crazy business season as you tie up all the loose ends of 2014 and plan your grand entrance to 2015.  Only nine and a half weeks to Christmas… try not to shop till you drop.  Remember all that glitters is not always gold.

Glitter greetings (and all things shiny)

Bohemian B

  

Bohemian B’s Beat

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Spring is the most exciting time of year for me, watching the world come to life is truly inspiring and for me, this year, it carries so much relevance to life in general, if we look closely enough that is.  In my opinion, this ‘happy’ season brings renewal and inspires new hope.Suddenly the world looks brighter, happier and friendlier as you notice many smiling faces and the sweet aroma in the air is almost intoxicating.  Spring symbolizes new beginnings and the ending of old things.   From the bland browns, grey's and gold colours of winter to the many shades of luscious greens dotted with a flamboyant array of colour as flowers start to bloom.  What’s not to love about this season? As Iris, a dear friend of my Nana once said, “Spring reminds me of romanticism, evoking thoughts of hand written love letters between forbidden lovers, left under the blooming Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow bush in secrecy for the other to find”.

Being the season of renewal, I came to the realization that one of the best services to the world is the service of looking after yourself.  If you cannot love yourself and recognize your own self-worth, you are more of a burden to the world than a pleasure.  How can someone love and respect you if you, yourself don’t deem yourself worthy enough?  Changing this mind-set is not always the easiest thing to accomplish, remembering the change is always a challenge but also not forgetting that it is the opportunity for growth and self-awakening.  Your density is in your hands, the job is yours to achieve and complete, the responsibility is yours alone.  If you can’t make you happy, how can anyone/thing else accomplish that? If you are constantly faced with the negativity in every situation, it is more than likely that you have chosen to feel this way.  Once you decide and commit to something and once your mind is consumed with certain thoughts, you eventually portray what you are thinking to the world.  Remember, misery loves company and the image you portray is what you eventually attract to yourself.  Depending on another to ‘make you happy’, is not only your lack to take responsibility for your own happiness and life but also a huge and unfair responsibility you are placing on another person. 

   I see it like, if you pick flowers from your neighbours garden instead of yours, you are taking what does not belong to you.  Why don’t you plant and tend to your own flowers?  If you ride on someone else’s ‘coat tails’ as they reach for success, then it is their success, not yours, you still need to work for your own.  Yes we all want to feel loved, appreciated, wanted and welcome, however, forcing your way into a certain place or situation or even relationship, is not a recipe for success but rather disaster. Building your happiness on somebody else’s demise or pain will also get you absolutely nothing but an open door for the same thing to happen to you eventually (remember our friend Karma?).

The moral of the story is this, your life is your story.  Your life is your responsibility.  Plant and tend to your own flowers, don’t take what does not belong to you.  Thinking of the Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow bush again, yesterday it was planted, today it is in full bloom and tomorrow winter comes and it will wither and die, making place for the new buds to be welcoming-'ly' appreciated in the new season. 

   Stop, observe, listen and take in the beauty of spring.  Take a moment to smell the fragrance of renewal in the air and choose to be, not only a pleasure, but also of service to the world.  The grass may appear greener on the other side of the fence and maybe it is, but the other side of the fence is not your garden, not your grass.  Work at making the grass on your side of the fence greener as your side is your responsibility.  Don’t try to take somebody else’s grass as you may end up being sorely disappointed in the end with no sense of accomplishment of your own.  So put on that sexy new bikini you've been waiting all winter to flaunt and get busy in your own garden, watering your own grass and tending your own flowers.

Glitter greetings (and all things shiny)

Bohemian B

Bohemian B’s Beat

Don’t Blink

Amazing is the magnificence of our town’s very large numbers of self-educated drivers who enthusiastically demonstrate their free spirited nature, mistaking our rough terrain roads for Khyalami.  The use of indicators are seemingly only necessary when traffic officers are spotted in the distance.  And you dare not blink whilst driving as you could open your eyes to complete change in scenery as many of these brilliant drivers have a growing love for abstract metal art. 

Thinking along these lines forced me to retreat into my Bohemian bubble of deep thought and see the relevance of this scene in my own life.  I realised (with horror) that along the rough terrain of my life journey, I have often changed the route direction on many occasions (to many to mention due to pure embarrassment) without indicating, leaving behind other life journey terrain users wondering what had happened to me and where I had veered off to.  Now, whilst I’ve made this decision and embarked along the detoured route, in the process leaving important happenings, opportunities, people and dreams behind, I made the big mistake of blinking.  When I opened my eyes again (they were only closed for a second), years had passed, people had disappeared, dreams had expired, priorities had changed and opportunities had been missed.  If I had followed the coordinated route planned for my life journey and stuck to it, I might have been a ’bonafied’ rocket scientist today, not just the self-proclaimed one I am. Maybe if I had indicated instead for just swerving into the new lane paved with sparkles and glitter (which could actually have been tin foil and shards of glass), someone who knew better (a real rock scientist) could have stopped me and at least have warned me of the dangers of travelling alone.

I would still have continued on that route but at least someone would know where I am and keep watch from a distance while I explore the adventures of curiosity and stubbornness.  The point is this, you are where and when you are in life because that’s where you are meant to be at the right time just don’t veer off without indicating.  And be careful of the adventure trail you chose because initially it may be so adventurous that you lose time and by the time you do open your eyes, finding your way back to the coordinated path might be harder than expected. Only veer off if you are fully prepared to learn the lessons which you will be taught along this road. I don’t regret taking the adventure trail at all, I value each lesson learnt along the way and cherish each memory.   I regret losing everything I gave up (without even realising I did) and all for just that, an adventure. So remember, indicators are not just for vehicles and blinking is a time machine!

Glitter greetings (and all things shiny)

Bohemian B