Thursday, 20 November 2014

Socially acceptable

Truth.  Something we all want, something we all strive for and often something we all hide from, maybe not all truth but very often our own truth.  We hide behind the mask of fitting in socially, fitting in to a set standard expected of us, standards which are normally set by others who are nowhere near succeeding at setting standards of their own. 
   This Bohemian B has often been referred to as a mess and all too often I hid behind the silliness  I can easily summon up out of hurt, disappointment or offensive emotions  to ‘laugh it off’, yet (without displaying the emotion, still feel the stab of Pain which accompanies the hurt, disappointment and even offence).  Until one day, probably from sheer exhaustion of trying to keep up the facade of ‘fitting in’, I decided to embrace the ‘mess’ that I am and to forget social acceptance choosing  to rather live my truth, right out in the open, no more hiding my ‘me-ness’ or apologizing for my ‘ much-ness’.  What did I have to lose anyway– the good ‘ol opinion of others?   Others, who don’t seem to know how to ‘do’ life either quite frankly, I choose to live life with a dash of spice and only because this is my own personal flavour,.  But along with  living my truth  comes the merciless task of making ( sometimes) life changing decisions, which have had and occasionally still have the tendency to leave a bitter sweet taste in my mouth, dancing along my taste-buds.   New lessons are learnt almost daily and new discoveries made along the way, all about my-self, is intoxicatingly exhilarating and horrendously scary all at once.  As fascinatingly scary as this new journey is, it is all part of the growing process and the ominous and not so easy exercise of self embracing and honest and real truth of you and as you start to unfold in this process so you start living, not just existing.
Self acceptance, self truth, self love......all vital criteria in self discovery, after all you are not a reflection of people who can’t love, accept or even tolerate you, you must be a reflection of your own truth radiating  self assurance to everyone around you.   As so you (slowly at first maybe) start to realize your worth and proceed to remove yourself from situations that do not serve you nor add value to your life.  Shakespeare said, “To thine self be true”.  Often we think that we need to persevere and remain in a certain place as not to be named ‘quitter’.  Believing that 1) we are no better than what we are receiving or 2) have a superior ego believing that our pure presence will turn things around in our own favour and sometimes this could be your very truth, however, not to your own detriment.   I realized that staying in an unsavoury situation or with someone even who doesn't appreciate you isn't loyalty, but rather stupidity.  No, this is not an act of selfish defiance, but rather an act of bravery and self empowerment.   Reclaiming your own ‘you-ness’ is not a selfish act but rather heroic.  Be the hero of your own life story.  We all know the basic principle of accepting others for whom (or even what, in some cases are!) that we should adhere to, yet the same does not apply to ourselves, mmmm ....maybe we should actually start practicing what we preach?  I know that I am not beautiful like you, I am beautiful like me.  I cannot be you, nor do I want to, as I’m (only now really) starting to enjoy being me. A good example would be that personally I like affection, but I have found that nowadays most people don’t like holding hands in public, especially if you don’t know them...... yes I know that was a lame joke, but I happen to think its hilarious considering the fact that that I have an active imagination, a cheeky and often mischievous side and think in pictures.  You may not share the same sentiment and that’s alright, because if I have to be completely honest , for the first time in my life, I really don’t mind what you think, I am not here to win a popularity contest, well not with you anyway but certainly with myself and yes, I win.  I may not be many things and am certainly not everyone’s ‘cup-of-tea’, I fall. I rise. I make (many) mistakes. I LIVE, not merely exist.  I’ve been hurt, but I’m alive.  I’m human.  I’m not perfect, but I am thankful.
Embracing your messy ‘you-ness’ and living your truth may not win you any popularity contests or ambassador awards, but it is indeed  liberating to realize the freedom to be, unashamedly you.  
   So go on then, embrace the glorious mess that you are and proudly be you, the real you.  Live your own truth and be personally acceptable opposed to being moulded into a clone by society to carry the mundane label, ‘socially acceptable’. 

Glitter greetings (and all things shiny)
Bohemian B

Follow me at: http://bohemianb.blogspot.com/  for more Bohemian B ramblings 

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